Monday, 26 March 2018

"I appreciate your exquisite taste, but" - a list of previous proposals

I thought they were four when this came up at a party. Then I remembered more. So, before I forget:

I am 12. Boy gets down on one knee. I didn't know he was interested at all? This is what boredom does with you when you are twelve? We both forget about this a few seconds later.

I am 14. Man wonders hypotethically if he could marry me. I explain my heart is taken (it wasn't at the time). He then suggests adopting me. Then he sighs and admits his heart is taken, too, which I knew all the time; the proposal was simply a compliment of my character (maybe my detailed knowledge about the history of the death of a Swedish king added to it).

I am 18, in France. Man with curly hair gets down on one knee at the mere sight of me. Exclaims: "I can cook and do the dishes!"

I am 20. At a board meeting, I suggest our magazine could maybe publish an article written by Stephen Hawking. "If you manage to do that, I will marry you", young man at the meeting table announces.

I am 22, I think. My neighbour in physics class presents his stable economy, his flat at a fancy address and draws a diagram to show how optimal we are for each other. I explain we are an unsolvable equation.

I am 27. He runs to the door I just opened and pushes everyone hindering his movement: "get out of my way!" Then, lands on one knee, spreads his arms and turns to me: "Will you marry me, Jana?" Everyone stunned.

I am 30. I enter the room of a castle called the "wedding room", these days used for lunches and conferences, and my colleagues inform me that my youngest male colleague has expressed a wish to marry. As all the women at the table knowingly are involved with other men, there are not many options left - they say. Note that this is the first day that all of us met. Love them <3

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